If you’ll look this morning in your bulletin in the sermon notes, you’ll notice I ask a question I want to start with today. Self-love? Should Christians love themselves, should we have self-love? The answer is no…and yes. No, if you define self-love the way the world does, no, self-love is not a good thing and it is something that shouldn’t be embraced. Now, there might be some aspects of worldly “self-love” that might be ok, like setting healthy boundaries, and forgiving yourself. But some other aspects of worldly “self-love” are in fact selfish and against a Christ-centered life. Like being true to yourself, which would include not being held responsible for parts of your character that aren’t God-honoring and need to be changed. Or like accepting yourself just as you are in this moment, which can be taken to the extreme to mean that you don’t have to be held accountable for wrongs you are doing or a sinful life that is being lived.
But, there is a kind of self-love Christians can and should embrace, and it’s the kind of love that we would also hold for other brothers and sisters in Christ. Let’s look at our passage for today, 1 John 3:19-24, “We will know by this that we are of the truth, and will set our heart at ease before Him, 20 that if our heart condemns us, that God is greater than our heart, and He knows all things. 21 Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God; 22 and whatever we ask, we receive from Him, because we keep His commandments and do the things that are pleasing in His sight. 23 This is His commandment, that we believe in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, and love one another, just as He commanded us. 24 The one who keeps His commandments remains in Him, and He in him. We know by this that He remains in us, by the Spirit whom He has given us.” (NASB)
John talks about heart condemnation here, and I want to talk about what this is, by first talking about what it’s not. Heart condemnation is not conviction of sin. Sometimes you can confuse the two, and that’s because they can be similar in the things that we feel when we are being convicted of sin and when our hearts are condemning us.
Here’s some effects of sin on our hearts, our minds, and our bodies. Psalm 32:3 says, “When I kept silent about my sin, my body wasted away Through my groaning all day long.” (NASB) Unrepented sin will literally eat at your body. Your body actually feels the affects of sin on itself, in a very real and physical way. The guilt and shame of not dealing with sin can lower your immune response to illnesses and stress. This is a Psalm of David, and you can imagine that David had personal experience with the effects of sin on his heart and body. He tried to cover up his adultery with Bathsheba and his murder of her husband, and didn’t repent of his sin until after he was confronted by the prophet Nathan. In the meantime, he felt the effects of those sins on his body.
1 Thessalonians 5:19-22 helps us understand that giving into evil can cause the Spirit’s voice to be silenced in our lives, so we understand that sin affects our ability to hear from God.
Psalm 51:12 says that sin steals your joy and excitement for life. Philippians 4:7 says that sin robs you of your peace. 1 John 1:6 tells us that sin can leave us feeling alone, and out of fellowship with God. So, when we, as Christians, are harboring sin in our hearts, it can affect us in very real and physical ways. It affects our physical well-being, silences the Spirit, steals our joy and excitement for life, robs your peace, and leaves you feeling alone and isolated. The tricky thing is though, that heart condemnation can leave you with the same feelings.
How do we sort out the difference between real sin that needs to be repented of and turned away from in the life of the Christian, and the heart condemnation that John talks about? I want you to hear this verse from Matthew 26:75, “And Peter remembered the statement that Jesus had made: “Before a rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.” And he went out and wept bitterly.”
Just as the Spirit did for Peter, when we sin, the Spirit will name sins specifically. He won’t just make you uneasy and not tell you why. He will say, “That is sin.” He will say, “That is wrathful anger that is wrong…those are lustful desires you are harboring…that is arrogant and destructive pride…that movie is dishonoring to God…that hate-filled word you said is wrong…etc.” The Spirit will never give you a feeling that you are doing something wrong without telling you what it is!
So then, if what you’re feeling in your heart, the condemning that you might feel from time to time that hurts your body, that silences the Spirit’s voice, that steals your joy and excitement for life, that robs your peace, that leaves you feeling alone and isolated, if it’s not coming with a sin that is named and clearly sin, then it may be the heart condemnation that John is talking about.
Sometimes heart condemnation can come from past sin that has already been dealt with. Sins that you’ve already repented of and sins that you know you have been forgiven of because God’s Word has assured you of His forgiveness, and God is never wrong. So when He says your sins are forgiven, we can trust that they truly are forgiven.
John 8:1-11 gives the story of the woman caught in adultery. She is brought before Jesus to try to trap Him, but what Jesus actually ends up doing is sending away her accusers and freeing her from a life of sin. This is verses 10 and 11, “And straightening up, Jesus said to her, “Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “I do not condemn you, either. Go. From now on do not sin any longer.” (NASB) When we repent of our sins and Jesus forgives them, we can be sure that we will receive no condemnation in the future for those past sins.
Romans 8:1-2 further proves the point, “Therefore there is now no condemnation at all for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2 For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death.” (NASB) If you have repented of sin, you have received the forgiveness of that sin, and since you are in Christ Jesus, there is no condemnation for past sins that have already been forgiven! Condemnation comes from the law of sin and death, but we are free of that. If you find your heart condemning you for past sins, or things that you keep hashing over in your mind, agonizing about what you may have said or done or not said or done, there is no condemnation in Christ! This is God’s word, and here it is again, God is never wrong!
Psalm 130:3, a beautiful reminder of the deep measure of forgiveness our God gives us, “If You, Lord, were to keep account of guilty deeds, Lord, who could stand?” (NASB) The answer of course is “no one”. No one could stand if He kept a record of wrongs. But let’s remember 1 Corinthians 13:5 as well, from the infamous love chapter that describes to us what agape love looks like, “It (love) does not act disgracefully, it does not seek its own benefit; it is not provoked, does not keep an account of a wrong suffered,” Love, real true love, does not keep records of wrongs. Love keeps no record of sins done against it. God keeps no RECORD of wrongs, because as we know from later in 1 John, God is love.
I want to dive into this even more because it’s just so beautiful the way that God, the Father, the Son, forgives us. Job 14:17 says this, “My wrongdoing is sealed up in a bag, And You cover over my guilt.” (NASB) There’s two words here that Job uses to describe the way God forgives: sealed, and covered. Sealed up in a bag, the word sealed and the imagery is meant to make us think of a document that has a persons crimes or wrongdoings written on it, kind of like a juvenile record, sealed up with an official seal so it cannot be brought up against that person in the future to accuse them again. So God takes our sins that have been forgiven through the blood of Christ and our repentance, and seals them up so they can never again be used to accuse or condemn us.
The second word that Job uses is covered, which is meant to make us think of a wall that has something obscene written on it, like graffiti, but that then someone has taken white paint and painted over the graffiti so it can never be seen again. This is the way God forgives us, He covers our wrong doing so they can never be seen again, seals up our sins so they can never be used to condemn us in the future.
Listen to the words of Jeremiah 17:9, “The heart is more deceitful than all else And is desperately sick; Who can understand it?” (NASB) The heart, your heart is a LIAR. God keeps no record of wrongs…but we do! We keep records of our own wrongs and can’t forgive ourselves! Our hearts condemn us because of past sins, but sometimes our hearts condemn us just because it lies. It forgets the hope we have in Christ, it forgets the light that lives in us, it forgets the joy of abundant life in Jesus, it gets overwhelmed by the darkness and heaviness of burdens, it gets stuck in the pain of the past, and it condemns us for things that we are not condemned for! So as best as you can, even if you can hardly believe it sometimes, tell you heart to shut it!
That’s Biblical! Okay, I might be rephrasing a little, but isn’t this essentially what John is saying in 1 John 3:20? Let’s read it again, “that if our heart condemns us, that God is greater than our heart, and He knows all things.” So tell your heart to shut it, because what God has said about who you are in Him is greater than the condemnation of your heart, and here it is again…God is never wrong! So even if you can barely whisper it, tell your heart to shut it.
John encourages us, when our hearts try to condemn us, to look instead at the confidence we have in God, I’m calling it “God confidence”. It’s the confidence we have in knowing that what God says about us is the truth and so we can turn a deaf ear to the condemnations of our hearts.
John says only two things are required for this confidence, to believe in the name of God’s Son Jesus Christ, and to love one another as He has loved you. If you do this, if you are in Christ, John says that you can know that you have God’s Spirit, that you are in Him, and He is in you. And that truth that He is in you, gives you other confidences as well that can keep your heart anchored in truth and hope, in light and in joy when it tries to condemn you.
Hear these confidences from God’s Word this morning, and know, once again, that…God is never wrong!
Hebrews 4:16, “Therefore let’s approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace for help at the time of our need.” (NASB) You can have confidence that you have God’s grace and God’s mercy.
Matthew 11:28-30, “Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For My yoke is comfortable, and My burden is light.” (NASB) You can have confidence that you have rest in God, and light burdens.
Ephesians 3:12, “Through Him and through faith in Him we can approach God. We can come to Him freely. We can come without fear.” (NIRV) You can have confidence that through Christ you are free from shame and guilt that might try to condemn you.
And finally, Ephesians 3:16-19, which reminds us of God’s perfect love for us and 1 John 4:18, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear,…” (NASB) You can have confidence that God’s love for you sets you free from fear that tries to overwhelm your heart. This is what God’s Word says, and…God is never wrong!
1. Grow Up with God: Which describes your life right now, God confidence, or heart condemnation? Why? What can you do to take more of God’s confidence through His truths?
2. Grow Deeper with the Body: Look at these verses: Psalm 139:14; Ephesians 5:29; Mark 12:31; Ephesians 2:4-5; 1 John 4:19. What more comforts can they offer for yourself, and other brothers and sisters who might need encouragement? If you are the one who needs the encouragement, write it on a notecard and carry it with you this week to be reminded of often. Write the encouragement to a brother or sister who needs it.
3. Go Out: How can you talk about the confidence you have from God, and the true self-love you have for yourself, with someone who doesn’t yet know Christ? Consider talking with this person about how you foster true self-love.